Every once in a while I come across someone who is desperate to lose weight. They’ve made their weight the explanation for everything that’s wrong with their lives.
Desperation can lead to desperate measures that aren’t sustainable.
In truth, excess weight is not the problem . . . and weight loss is not the answer. The problem just might be over identification with the body. The answer is about restoring balance, or cultivating joy. Excess weight is something. But it’s not everything.
When you make your weight everything, everything becomes a struggle.
Don’t eat that. Eat this.
Don’t wear that. Wear this.
Don’t sit there. Sit here.
Isn’t it true that the more you obsess about your weight the more miserable you become? Shame and self-loathing are not helpful. Self-acceptance, self-respect and self-love, however, will serve you well. I know what you’re thinking. “How can I love this *?@!%*! body?”
There are women in Africa as desperate to be fat as Western women are to be thin. Large women represent prosperity and are desirable to men. This tells us that it’s not the weight. It’s the perception of the weight and what it means, or will bring. It’s image.
I’m not saying to stop trying. I’m saying to stop struggling. Your body only defines you if you think it does. The body is just a container for your spirit. It’s kind of like rented space for this one glorious life. Being overweight does not impact your worth. It does impact your health, however.
How do you stop struggling?
You stop obsessing about food and your weight.
You stop the crazy diets.
You stop self-loathing.
You stop hiding.
You stop putting your life on hold until you’ve lost the weight.
You stop using your weight as the reason for what isn’t working in your life.
If you are over identifying with your body you might try spreading your attention on other aspects of your life that you’ve maybe been ignoring. Who knows? Your self-image and your weight might change along with other improvements.